Somebody Save Me From Myself (Open)

John smiled. "Me too. So um... am I ever gonna meet your parents? Considering I'm having their grandchild..."

"John, I barely talk to my parents. But you're gonna meet Brett. Probly today," Ted replied.

John smiled. "Good. But you'll have to meet mine though..." He trailed off. "My Daddy is a scary man. He is a retired General, and has used on gun on some of my former boyfriends..."

"Honestly, my Dad is the scariest man you'll meet. He put the fear of God, literally, in me," Ted said.

John nodded slowly. "Well, that makes me feel better." He said flatly as he started to clean up all the pregnancy tests.

Ted chuckled. "He's so scary because when he's mad, he's silent. When you first meet him, he'll just stare at you," he said.

John blinked. "You're not helping!" He pouted as he plopped down on the bed, Carlisle hopping up and settling next to John.

"But Brett will love you!" Ted exclaimed, trying to lighten the mood.

"You think?" John asked quietly.

"Oh, I know," Ted said and kissed Johns cheek.

John smiled. "Good. When's he coming over?"

"In a few. He's coming over for dinner," Ted replied.

John nodded. He lifted his shirt, staring at his swelling abdomen. "You see that? I'm getting fat!" He pouted.

"Oh, stop it," Ted said, rolling his eyes. "And I'm going pale," he added sarcastically.

John pouted and took Ted's hand, putting it on his swelling abdomen. "See? I'm gonna get huge..."

"John, seriously. Are you saying being fat is a bad thing?" Ted asked, crossing his arms.

John blinked. "Well, yeah. Why? It's not like you're fat. It's just, I've always been pushed to look my best, whether I wanted to or not. I can't help it. I do'wanna be fat."

"Why is it bad to be fat? That's discrimination. Like saying its bad to be black or hispanic," Ted said.

"I'm not discriminating... I just, I don't wanna be fat. As a kid, people either said I was too fat or too skinny. So I just... tried to maintain the most perfect body as possible." He explained.

"John, you're perfect the way you are. You could be 300 pounds and I would still love you," Ted said.

John smiled, blushing. "Wow, thank you. But I don't wanna be 300 pounds, so don't worry about that." He chuckled. "And FYI, I was friends with all the fat kids and weirdos in school. So I don't discriminate."

"I wasn't. I made fun of them. And most of the poor people. I was a bag of douche," Ted said, chuckling.

John chuckled. "Wow. You were mean. But you're a sweetheart now, thank god." He said, kissing Ted's cheek.

"Yeah. Well, I still can be a jerk. A lot," Ted chuckled.

John raised a brow. "And I can be a bitch. We're perfect for each other." He chuckled, getting up and kissing him again. "I'll go get started on dinner. What does Brett like?" He asked as he walked down to the kitchen.