Somebody Save Me From Myself (Open)

Ted could only hope someone knew how he felt. The beatings, the rapes, the betrayals, only got worse that day. Randy and Cody practically beat and tortured him to death. He had the scars and now healed bones to prove it.

"Hey... I know what its like, Teddy. I understand.. and it'll get better, I promise." John whispered.

"You dont, though, John. To be raped by my boyfriend and my best friend right after I caught them having sex and then they beat within an inch of my life. I almost died and no one gave a fuck," Ted replied. He knew John had gone through some bad stuff himself but it wasnt what Ted went through, what he stills go through. Ted started drinking after that. He had become a slight alcoholic. But he hasnt had a drink since he started rooming with John.

John glared at Ted, moving away from him. "You have no fucking idea what I went through! For years, Dave tortured me. He would pimp me out to strangers! He would tie me to his bed and let strange men come in and fuck me! You have no fucking clue what its like to be be tied up and blindfolded, and not even know, 'Who's violating me, this time?'. And you almost died? Well I wish I had been fucking dead! But no, me tortured me every-fucking day for years. And no one can understand that..." He whispered at the end, tears streaming down his face as he went in the bathroom, slamming the door shut.

Ted sat there, not caring what John had said. And he hated that he didnt care. He wanted to care so bad but his heart just would let him. Honestly, going through what John went through would have been better. Yeah, it would suck but it wouldnt hurt. It wouldnt pull at his heartstrings, wouldnt make him feel so betrayed. It wasnt the physical abuse he went through. That he could handle. That he was used to. His father had done it. But the mental abuse? That he couldnt deal with. The emotional abuse? No. He was supposed to take antidepressants, but he drank instead.

John cried as he though about how badly Dave betrayed him. He though Dave had been genuine. he though he had loved him. But he just used and abused him. Every night, after he was raped, Dave would apologize. John would believe him. And the cycle would start all over again. It was a living hell.

Ted got up, walking over to the mini bar and pulling out some Russian vodka. He sat on the bed, opening the bottle and downing it.

John collects himself and went out to the room, seeing Ted down a bottle of Vodka. He cursed and grabbed the bottle from Ted. "What the fuck, Ted?! You think this is gonna help? It'll only make it worse you idiot!" He yelled.

Ted looked at him, the strong alcohol already working its magic. "Shhhhhhhh! The copses is gonna gets me if you not quiet! You gotsta be quiiiiiiieeeeettttttt," he said, giggling slight.

John rolled his eyes. "There are no 'copses' Ted, your shitfaced, now go to sleep, and don't wake up till your sober." He said, pulling Ted up to the pillows.

Ted frowned. "Dont tell me what to do. You arent my Daddy!" he yelled like a 5 year old.

John rolled his eyes again. "I know I'm not your Daddy, thank god for that. Just please, for me, go to sleep." He begged.

Ted pouted. "Fine. But your a big fat meanie head," he said before stripping to his boxers and laying down.

John sighed. "I'm not mean and I'm not fat. Do you want me to lay with you?" He asked.

Ted smiled brightly at him. "Yes, please, Daddy," he said, sounding very child-like.

John groaned. "I'm not Daddy, I'm Johnny." He muttered and laid next to Ted, cuddling up to him.

"Please dont hit me tonight, Daddy," Ted whispered before falling asleep.

John frowned at Ted's statement. "Johnny will never hurt you, Teddy. I will never hurt you..." He whispered before falling asleep as well.

Ted had a nightmare that night. Well, many nightmares. Ones of his father beating him, then of Randys physical, mental and emotional abuse. He woke up several times, crying, panting, sweating.

Every time Ted woke up John was always here, holding him, rubbing his back, doing anything to make him feel better.

Ted woke the next morning exhausted, his eyes half open. He didn't have they energy to move.

John got negative zero hours of sleep. He was up all night, making sure Ted slept and comforting him, making sure he was okay. And John was still awake, leaning against the headboard, half dead. He looked down when Ted awoke. "You okay?" He slurred.

Ted didn't move or answer. He was far too tired for that. He just looked at John for a few seconds then closed them.

John groaned quietly. He was starving, he was beyond exhausted and he had to pee so god damn bad. But every time he got up, Ted woke up from another nightmare. So he just tried to push his needs aside, and closed his eyes.

Ted didnt fall asleep, he just laid there with his eyes shut, taking deep breaths.