My Kinda Party

"No," Carter lied, not wanting John to get hurt by the fact that him and Shawn didn't like each other.

John smiled and kissed Carter's neck. "Good... wait your not lying to me, are you?" He asked. He hated when people lied to him.

"No," Carter said, pushing himself up from the couch. "I'm...I'm gonna go shower..>'

John nodded and watched him go. He sat next to Shawn, curled his feet under him as he sat close to him. "Something happen?" He asked with a raised brow.

"Me and that boy butted heads," Shawn sighed. "We're alot alike in some ways, me and him."

"Yeah, I noticed... I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing." John sighed. "I wish I could love one of you with hurting the other..."

"John...I'm an older man. I've had love and happiness. I understand if you only want him."

"I want to only want him... but you, HBK, are stuck on my mind..." John said. "A-And I dunno when I'll get over it... if I can get over it."

"John...one day I ain't gonna be here anymore. What are you gonna do then? Leave him?" Shawn asked.

John shook his head, tears in his eyes. "N-No... I wouldn't leave him..." He whispered. "I just... don't know how to get over you... damn, you really are a Heartbreaker, aren'tcha?" He said with a watery laugh.

Shawn laughed, "I have that effect on a lot of people."

John nodded and wiped his eyes. "I'm just afraid that if you leave... it'll hurt. And I don't want Carter to think that because I'm hurt, that I love you more than him." He whispered, sniffling slightly.

"Is it possible you love us both as much as the other," Shawn said.

John nodded. "Yeah, I do. It's just two different kinds of love." He sighed. "And you're right... when I have to watch you... get older... It'll hurt."

"Babe...I'm already gettin' older," Shawn sighed.

John sighed. "I know... Stupid age difference..." He muttered to himself.

Shawn was quiet, "Don't watch any old tapes of me when I'm over okay...you won't recognize the man that sits in front of you..>"

John sighed. "I've seen many of your matches. I know you... I know you were, how you are, and how you can get. Maybe if I were older or you were younger things would be easier but... life is just so damn complicated right now..." He sighed sadly.

"Life's always gonna be complicated," Shawn sighed. "Ain't your boyfriend done yet?"

John shrugged and went into the bedroom, knocking on the bathroom door. "Baby, you almost done?" He called.

Carter stood away from the mirror, wiping at his eyes, "Yeah I...I'm done..."

John walked in. "Baby, you sure your okay?" He asked softly.

Carter nodded, "Oh yeah, I just...uh...there was a sad song on the shower radio and I'm a sap..."

John smiled softly. "Imma sap too, its okay." He said, kissing Carer's cheek.

Carter wrapped his arms around John, "I love you so much..."