Life As He Knew It (Open)

"Hey..." John said softly, gently grabbing Randy's chin so he was looking at him. "Baby, I'd give up sex for the rest of my life than have someone touch me that wasn't you." He said. And it was true, even if that meant sexual frustration. He'd talk to Alex about that...

Randy sighed. "I love you, Johnny. Im sorry," he said quietly, looking down.

John felt guilty. "Randy, its not your fault. Everybody goes through... that... change eventually. I'll still love you no matter what." He said, kissing Randy's forehead, wishing Randy would stop doing the kicked puppy look. It was killing him.

"John, I just turned 31 and I dont want sex. And it only started right before I got mono. Im no doctor, but I have a feeling its something to do with my disease," Randy said.

John nodded. "Probably." He sighed. "There's.... always.... ya know... Viagra." He said, biting his lip.

"Its not getting up that I need help with, John. I just dont want to. I dont get turned on. I dont get horny. It wouldnt be satisfying," Randy replied. He was irritated. He was 31. He was still young. He should want sex.

John nodded. "Okay, relax. Only trying to help..." He grumbled. "Am I not satisfying? Do you... not want me?" He asked.

"Of course you're satisfying. You're sexy and amazing and the only person I want. Its not to do with you. Its me, John. When I walked in on you, I should have wanted to mount you then and there, but I didnt. Thats why I reacted the way I did. Thats why Im here. 'Cause my sex drive is fucked up. Im fucked up," Randy replied.

John nodded, finally understanding. "Oh... I see." He said, laying down next Randy. "Well... just to be sure.... tell me if you get turned on or not." He said. "Now close your eyes..." He whispered, kissing Randy's neck. He slowly snaked his hand up Randy's thigh, under his hospital own, and started stroking Randy's cock.

Randy bit his lip. He felt himself getting hard, but it was doing nothing to him emotionally or mentally. "Nothing," he sighed. Nothing...

John sighed, nodding and pulled his hand away. "Oh, alright then." He said. He didn't know what to do. He wanted sex. But he wanted it with Randy, not a fuck buddy. But could he really go on without sex? He was young, he was sexy, and he had the libido of a horny teenager going through puberty. He needed sex...

Randy sighed, starting to tear up. He couldnt even have sex with his own boyfriend. How much more of a failure could he be?

John saw Randy's eyes get misty. He reached up, kissed his cheek. "Oh baby... it'll be okay. We'll figure it out, yeah? There's gotta be something that'll bring your sex drive back. And if we don't... I'll always love you. And if it gets really bad... and if it's really necessary... I c-could get a fuck buddy. With someone you know that won't try anything other than sex... Randy, it'll be okay. I promise." He whispered.

Randy nodded, wiping away the tears. He believed John but he still felt like a failure.

"And Randy... don't ever feel like you failed me. Your everything to me. You've done more for me than any man has ever done for me. You made our first time amazing. You're helping me get over all my mental problems. You pamper me when I don't deserve it. You compliment me even when I feel and look horrible. You hold me during the night when I'm crying... you do it all, baby." John whispered, kissing away the tears.

Randy teared up again. "Damn it, John. You're turning me into a baby," he said with a small smile, looking up and willing the tears away. Why did John have to go and say what he needed to hear and make him cry? Why did he have to be so perfect? Randy didnt know. All he knew is he wouldnt change it.

John smiled softly. "Yeah, well believe it or not, its okay to breakdown and cry. And when you finally do decide to push your stupid pride aside and let it go, I'll be here. I'll always be here, libido or not, I'm always gonna be here for you, amore.... and your fucking beautiful, remember that." He whispered, kissing Randy's temple.

A few tears ran down Randys face. Then a few more. Finally, he took Johns advice and pushed his pride aside, breaking down and crying. About his disease, about his bike, about his job, about everything. He buried his face in Johns chest and just cried.

John kissed Randy's head and let him breakdown in his arms. He was relieved, he was afraid Randy was going to hold in all his pain. But now he was letting it all go.
Finally. John thought as he held Randy.

Randy cried for hours until he literally couldnt cry anymore. He looked up at John and sniffled, his nose incredibly stuffed. "Water," he said hoarsly. All the crying had dehydrated him and his throat was dry.

John sat up, pouring Randy a glass of water. He didn't think he'd ever seen somebody cry out so much pain. When Randy finished his water, he reached over and grabbed a tissue, wiping Randy's eyes, nose and cheeks. "Feel better?" He asked, stroking Randy's tear stained cheek.

Randy nodded, smiling a bit. "Thank you," he said. His voice was still hoarse, but not as much.

John smiled softly. "Told you so." He whispered, kissing Randy's tear streaked cheek. "You must have really been holding that in. You cried for two hours straight." He chuckled softly. "But it feels good to let it out, doesn't it? Now you know why i do it so much." He chuckled lightly.

Randy chuckled. "Crying isnt really my thing," he said and sniffled. "Can you hand me a tissue?"

john handed Randy a tissue. "Maybe. But you're only human. It's in everyone's nature." He chuckled, glancing down at his tear soaked shirt. Not that he actually cared. He groaned when his phone rang. He looked at the number before answering. "H-Hi Vince... yeah... I know... But we can't.... I know but he's injured!.... But it's... Atlanta?... Two days? But I can't I have... yes sir..." He said timidly as he spoke with his boss on the phone. VInce wanted him at WrestleMania... and John really had no choice.